And just for thought...
I am not sure what to tell you.
There is nothing easy to say.
Do you want to hear fiction or fairy tale?
Because I could make up everything.
I could tell you I am at a place that I love
and inside a world that couldn't get any fuller
but I would be lying.
We would both know it.
It isn't that I hate where I am.
I just know I can always do better,
that if my life had taken a right instead of a left,
I would be some place totally different.
The fact that I know this,
know so completely when that choice of a turn happened, holds me back.
Should I tell you that I am happy?
Or I am thrilled to work ten times harder just to prove some dumb point to myself?
I could tell you that the void that I carry like a cross will always remain
and nothing I do will ever make it go away.
I would rather just make up shit,
made up moments I only wish I could claim.
Would anyone really listen anyway?
At the end of the day, I'm just a girl who has been in love with writing her entire life. I am full of quirks, anxieties, fears, joys, laughter. And all I have wanted to do was give the world a smile.