And just for thought...
He asked me for a dance but I shook my head
And hoped he would forget I existed
Not because I was afraid to be seen
But because I was terrified he'd see too much.
I sit down with my trusty pen, peeking out of my corner,
Knowing full well how my soul splatters,
Knowing my heart is an open window right now
But I will never accept your hand
Only because the proverbial you always comes too close.
I want you to know my name without recognizing my face,
Just a hum in the back of your mind,
A song you sing but don't really know.
He smiled at me and offered me his questions
And I threw him some lines so he would go
Not because I didn't enjoy his company
But because I knew I had him hooked.
I laugh at the amount of effort I put into hesitating.
I know there is no need to be shy,
No need to play possum when my bullshit is already out there for the world to see.
I can't be ashamed of what I willingly offer
But his dance I would not accept, his smile I would not return
And I hoped he understood I was not being cruel all those times away I walked.
I was hoping he would forget I existed,
Hoping the only part of me that lived on with him wasn't my face
But my words that I wrapped around him like a blanket
When he wasn't looking.
At the end of the day, I'm just a girl who has been in love with writing her entire life. I am full of quirks, anxieties, fears, joys, laughter. And all I have wanted to do was give the world a smile.